Hey guys,
Today the day I’d like to talk about pain.
Before I got rheumatoid I didn’t even take a painkiller for a headache I’d ride it out, I’m pretty hardy really.
When I got rheumatoid I didn’t appreciate how much pain would affect my life. My first ever flare up and true experience of rheumatoid pain although 10 years a go still lives in my memory the start of something I wasn’t ready to for.
One morning I woke up and I literally felt like I’d been hit by a car, I couldn’t move everywhere hurt, I tried to change from my pjs and I couldn’t, my body wouldn’t work and every time I tried it hurt, tears running down my face I couldn’t understand how this was possible. I stayed in bed that Saturday with the cat by my side, I was also so tired I must have slept most of the day, this wasn’t me I didn’t sleep In the day.
The pain in my right foot/ankle intensified at this point I couldn’t put a sock on it hurt, I couldn’t even put a sheet on it, by this point I was sure I’d broken my foot. So I made my now ex take me to docs who looked at it and said take some painkillers and we’ll see how you get on. By the next day I couldn’t use the foot at all I was crying and couldn’t get done stairs. So off I went back to docs and he broke it to me vicky it’s rheumatoid WHAT? This wasn’t good and I insisted it wasn’t so he humoured me and I had an X-ray and sure enough it was rheumatoid. After a few days, rest & paracetamol I was feeling better and could resume life!
You see pain is so intense it feels like a broken bone, you crnt sleep it hurts so much. It isn’t just the bone though it’s the muscle the ligaments every part of your join put hurts, moving hurts, it stings when I apply my gel I think it’s due to working. But the relief isn’t always there.
Just recently I’ve had a major flare up in my right shoulder, again fatigue hit hard, but as a side sleeper sleeping hurts, really hurts. The joint doesn’t work any more my rheumatologist declared my shoulder useless! LOL and trust me the only thing it’s good for is giving me pain, from the shoulder blade on my back to the elbow which is also useless!
But I’ll keep smiling as being grumpy doesn’t achieve anything but yes I’ll often cry when I’m in my room for bed, thankfully my cat always gives fuss.. although I appreciate that less at 5am when he’s just making sure I’m ok!
Vicky xx
